A friend asked me an interesting question yesterday: How did I come to accept that I am gay?
The simply answer is, there is nothing for me to accept. I just am. I mean, straight people don't go around trying to "accept" that they are straight; nor left-hander go around trying to "accept" that they are left-hander.
My breakthrough really came when I realized there is nothing to accept. What is a more powerful statement is to create a social environment where the issue of sexuality is as trivial as that of left-handedness or right-handedness.
I have a very simple and straight-foward analogy on sexuality. It's like a person's main-hand. It is natural for a right-hander to write using his right hand, but can he also write with his left hand? It might be a painful process, it might take a lot of effort and it is frustrating, and the end results will be miles apart from using the natural hand, but it IS possible for everyone to write using his/her off-hand.
Some people are ambidexterous, like some people are bisexual. Is that a good news? I don't know, why don't you tell me?
(For the record, for me that would be a bragging right.)
Showing posts with label generic. Show all posts
Showing posts with label generic. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Foreword: Love simply is
It has become a tradition that everything I write must have something to do with love.
It is as if, without that wellspring of inspiration, the words themselves will lose all colors.
Yet, what is love, really?
Under usual circumstances, the reaction of most people is to associate love with the feelings of affection and passion between two unrelated adults. Then they will also acknowledge the love that existed among families, especially those between a mother and a child. Some then quickly associate love with friendships.
For most people who are not in the divine business, love can only exist between people that know each other. It is logically so. I mean, how can anyone love someone that he or she doesn't know?
But stop there for a moment.
Is it possible to love a stranger? Could it be possible that love must exist before you can know any person? A simple example is the classic "love-at-first-sight". When you meet someone for the first time, and you find the person attractive, you'll naturally want to know the person, and you'll take action if the attraction is strong enough. So in that case, love actually exists before the knowledge of another person exists.
You could argue, that attraction must exist and it has nothing to do with love. But another simple way to look at it is that love has always existed. Your judgement on the person of whether he is attractive determines whether you deny that love.
This is of course, one of many ways of looking at things.
But for me, there is no answer to that question, because love simply is.
Just like bird must fly and fish must swim, we human must love.
(Inspired by "The Witch of Portobello" by Paulo Coelho)
It is as if, without that wellspring of inspiration, the words themselves will lose all colors.
Yet, what is love, really?
Under usual circumstances, the reaction of most people is to associate love with the feelings of affection and passion between two unrelated adults. Then they will also acknowledge the love that existed among families, especially those between a mother and a child. Some then quickly associate love with friendships.
For most people who are not in the divine business, love can only exist between people that know each other. It is logically so. I mean, how can anyone love someone that he or she doesn't know?
But stop there for a moment.
Is it possible to love a stranger? Could it be possible that love must exist before you can know any person? A simple example is the classic "love-at-first-sight". When you meet someone for the first time, and you find the person attractive, you'll naturally want to know the person, and you'll take action if the attraction is strong enough. So in that case, love actually exists before the knowledge of another person exists.
You could argue, that attraction must exist and it has nothing to do with love. But another simple way to look at it is that love has always existed. Your judgement on the person of whether he is attractive determines whether you deny that love.
This is of course, one of many ways of looking at things.
But for me, there is no answer to that question, because love simply is.
Just like bird must fly and fish must swim, we human must love.
(Inspired by "The Witch of Portobello" by Paulo Coelho)
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